


(4+1) "don't worry, because i'll make sure everyone makes it"

by serenity_axel



Series: Stray Kids: OT9 [2]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: 4+1, Changlix if you squint, Eliminations, Fluff and Angst, I barely edited it, because that's about the only material available on these guys, cut me some slack, excessive use of the words tears in the beginning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-03-25 20:58:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13842915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/serenity_axel/pseuds/serenity_axel
Summary: Chan takes care of the kids, but he needs to be taken care of, too.orfour times Chan comforted the members and one time they comforted him





	(4+1) "don't worry, because i'll make sure everyone makes it"

1.

Jeongin stopped as the music faded out. Why can't I get it right? _I'm trying so hard, so why can't I do it?_ He walked to the wall of the practice room and slid down into a sitting position, rubbing his watery eyes.

But then, the tears came.

All he could think about was that he was still severely lacking. He was a weak link, and he was terrified of bringing the group down with him. What was it that JYP had said?

_("Instead of bringing the group down to their level, the lacking members will be eliminated.")_

Jeongin cried harder.

He was terrified of bringing the group down with him, but even more terrified of being cast out. _How selfish of me._ The door opened. Hurriedly, Jeongin wiped the wet tears from his face. "Who is it?" he croaked.

Chan stepped into the room and knelt by the maknae with a bowl of rice and a can of cola. He set the items down in front of Jeongin and gestured towards them. "For you."

Silently, Jeongin nodded and started to eat. As he ate, he quietly began to cry again, choking on the rice a little bit and spilling a few drops of cola.

"Hey, hey, Jeonginnie. It'll be okay," Chan murmured softly, ruffling the younger boy's hair. "You're doing well. So don't worry, because I'll make sure everyone makes it."

Slowly, Jeongin lifted his head to meet his leader's kind eyes. "Really?"

"Really."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

 

—-

 

2.

"The member who is being eliminated is Minho."

They all stood in silence as JYP moved towards the selected member and briefly embraced him. Gradually, the weight of those words was realized.

_I'm not part of it anymore. I've been eliminated. This is actually happening._

Jisung wrapped his arms around Minho. Felix cried harder. They all took in the devastated dancer with cold tears and warm hearts.

"Aigoo, aigoo, aigoo. Why'd you forget the lyrics?" Chan joked with a sad smile plastered on his face.

"I don't—I don't know," Minho whispered.

Chan opened his arms. Minho took the signal and moved towards the leader, clutching his waist tightly and burying his tear stained face into Chan's shoulder. "I'm sorry," he choked out.

Chan squeezed the other male even tighter. "Why are you sorry? If anything, I should be the one who's sorry."

That night, Minho left the dorm and moved in with the other trainees. After tearful farewells and a promise of a video message, Chan gathered the remainder of the members in the living room.

"I know this is hard."

Silence.

"I know you guys are having doubts about going on."

Everyone refused to meet his eyes.

"We have to go on."

Jisung looked up and fixed Chan with an angry glare. "What do you mean 'go on'? Someone's just been eliminated—we aren't even Stray Kids anymore!"

Chan stared back emotionlessly. "So you think we should give up? Minho wouldn't want us to stop!" He shouted the last sentence. Jisung flinched.

"I'm sorry," Jisung muttered. "I was out of line."

Chan looked to each member. "Tomorrow, we'll go to practice. We'll do whatever the company asks us to do. And we'll go on. This is....all of our dream. And it's Minho's, too, I know that. So that's why we have to work harder than ever."

Everyone nodded. Once, twice. And then Chan ordered them all to get some sleep. Since everybody knew Chan always stayed up late working on music, Woojin went to the big room to sleep with Jisung. Jisung welcomed the eldest with open arms and the two cuddled for the rest of the night.

A few hours later, Changbin stepped out into the living room where the leader was still mixing. He approached the older silently, gently poking Chan's shoulder to get his attention. Chan removed his headphones and curiously looked at the rapper who shyly clutched Gyu in his right arm.

"Are you ok?" Chan asked.

Instead of answering, Changbin said, "Are you almost done?"

Chan hesitated. "Yeah. Actually, I just finished."

"Can I....can we talk?"

Chan stood up and lead them towards the kitchen. "Of course. Tell me whatever's on your mind."

Neither of them got much sleep. Instead, the two spent the rest of the night talking about serious things, silly things, music related things, Minho related things. Changbin cried several times. Chan always guided the younger into his arms when that happened, and the two shared their thoughts about the outcome of the show. Chan told Changbin exactly what he told Jeongin.

"Don't worry, because I'll make sure everyone makes it."

 

—-

 

3.

Seungmin started coughing violently midway through his part. His throat burned; the bottle of water he drank felt like a bottle of vodka.

"Seungmin, you need to stop."

Seungmin looked at Chan, the owner of that stern voice, rather fearfully. "But—the competition!"

"I'd rather lose your voice for this mission than lose your voice for the rest of the show. Your throat isn't in a good condition, Seungmin. You need to stop."

Seungmin remained silent. Jeongin stepped toward him, but he held a hand up in a stop gesture. "I'm just—I'm just going to wash up."

As he walked out of the practice room, he heard Woojin say, "Chan, that was too harsh."

He didn't hear Chan reply. He thought the older probably _didn't_ reply.

As he walked, he mentally berated himself for not taking better care of his body. _Why'd I have to be so careless?_

He entered the bathroom. Leaned against the wall with his head in his hands. The door opened, and Seungmin looked up, startled.

Chan hesitantly approached him, hiding something behind his back.

"Here." It was a water bottle with faint yellow liquid. "It's honey lemon water."

"Oh—thanks."

They stood in silence as Seungmin sipped the honey lemon water.

"Listen...."

Seungmin curiously looked at the leader.

"Seungmin, just because you don't sing for this mission doesn't mean you'll be eliminated. You know that, right?"

Seungmin quietly chuckled. "That's not what I'm worried about."

Chan stepped a bit closer and leaned against the wall beside him. "What is it, then?"

He sighed. "This is a company competition. I wanted to show my family...."

After a few moments, "Sorry."

Seungmin shook his head. "No. No, I know. It's a shame, but this is just how things are."

"I know how badly you want to do it. But, I do stand by my decision. I don't want you to ruin your voice, Seungmin-ah." Chan grabbed his shoulders and turned him so they were facing each other. "You'll be able to show your family a lot more after this."

Seungmin looked away as his eyes started to water. "You don't—you don't know that. Minho's already...." He couldn't finish the sentence.

Slowly, Chan shook his head. "No, I don't know," he admitted. "But don't worry."

Seungmin looked up.

"Because I'll make sure everyone makes it."

 

—-

 

4.

"I'm sorry, but you guys won't be able to continue as you are."

Eyes misted.

"Felix, you are eliminated."

Everyone looked to the floor or to the ceiling as they fought to control the wave of despair that threatened to overtake the eight members.

JYP exited the room.

For several seconds, the members froze. And then Jisung practically tackled Felix with a remorseful embrace. All Felix could do was cry and say sorry, over and over again.

"Always find me, yeah?" Chan said, in English, cheeks tear-stained. "I won't leave you behind."

Felix nodded. Too choked up to verbally answer.

"Hyung is sorry," Changbin sobbed as Felix moved into his arms.

"Why is hyung sorry? Really, why is hyung sorry?"

That night, Felix, too, left the dorm and moved in with the other trainees. And again, Chan gathered the now remaining seven members into the living room.

"This—," his voice broke. "This wasn't supposed to happen."

The dam blocking their tears cracked.

"Guys," Chan said quietly, "this isn't the end."

Jisung cried harder. _Minho, now Felix,_ he wanted to shout at the leader, _How can we possibly continue when we're incomplete?_

"This isn't how it'll end."

Jisung met Chan's determined gaze.

"Don't worry," he continued. "Regardless of the eliminations, regardless of JYP...."

They all looked to their leader, who clutched the fabric of the couch tightly and held each of their stares with a more angry, more intense one of his own.

"I'll make sure everyone makes it."

 

—-

 

+1. (5.)

Changbin couldn't sleep. It was probably because he'd forgotten Gyu in Felix's room, or maybe it was because he was still excited from the outcome of their last mission.

_"You'll debut as nine. Congratulations, Stray Kids."_

A grin spread across his face as he remembered it. The joy he felt, the overwhelming relief. He stepped out into the living room, heading towards the kitchen to get a glass of water. Before he could, however, he spotted a head of silver hair sitting on the couch. "Chan-hyung?"

Chan turned around, momentarily startled until he saw who had called him. "Changbin-ah," he said, "why aren't you asleep?"

"I could ask you the same."

Chan chuckled. "You know I barely do anyway."

Changbin, water and the reason why he was even out there completely forgotten, sat by Chan on the couch. "Really, why aren't you asleep?" he pressed.

Chan hummed the chorus for Hellevator before answering. "Couldn't."

"Why?"

"I'm still trembling."

Changbin looked to Chan's hands and saw that, indeed, they were shaking violently. He took one of the leader's hands in his own to still it. "Since when?"

"Since the broadcast."

"That's an awfully long time."

"I'm just—," Chan's voice broke. "I'm just so glad."

Changbin peered at Chan's face and was surprised to see a few tears leak from his eyes. He suddenly pulled away and hid his face in his hands, to hide his tears, if possible, from the younger rapper.

 _I was so scared,_ he wanted to say, _I was so scared of losing you all. And I feel ashamed for feeling that terrified. Like there was a chance of some of us being left behind._

"You were scared," Changbin whispered.

Chan didn't answer.

Changbin took Chan's hands and guided them away from his face, just as a thump and a curse sounded from the kitchen entrance just a few feet away. Chan, still struggling to get himself together, remained facing forward while Changbin look to see who it was. It was Jisung, clutching his right foot and snarling at the corner of the door frame.

 _Sorry,_ Jisung mouthed. He curiously pointed at Chan, who had gone back to covering his face, as if to ask a question: _What's with him?_

Changbin just beckoned him over. Jisung hesitantly tiptoed towards the two and then knelt down on the floor by them. From there, he could see Chan's wet hands pressed into his eyes. Hear his struggled breathing.

"Chan..." he whispered. "Why are you upset?"

Chan softly laughed and wiped his eyes, finally bringing his hands down to his lap. "I'm happy."

Which made Jisung even more confused.

"They're happy, overwhelmed tears," Chan insisted. "I'm really, honestly happy, Jisung."

The three members didn't say much else after that. They sat, together, on the couch, content in one another's company. As Chan slipped into sleep, he whispered fifteen words so quietly that Jisung and Changbin almost thought they imagined it:

"A new era is starting. But don't worry, because I'll make sure everyone makes it."


End file.
